I fight so hard to NOT be all or nothing. To not judge myself by some completely unrealistic standard...but I fail miserably. Occasionally I look around and think, "man, if that person at that skill level has attained some success, why can't I?". But then I remember that 'the game' is not about skill or talent, but about fashion and willingness to sell one's self down the river. That is something I can not do.
Why do I care so much? Why am I so insecure outwardly? It seems to contradict the spirit inside of me. Who's approval am I seeking? My own? Why do I feel I have to be THE BEST and not just the best I can be?
Rhetorical questions of course. Now off to read, for some inspiration.
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It's worse than that. If it only were the willingness to sell one's self down the river, than truly anyone could do it.
ReplyDeleteFact is, every success is a fluke. No formulas work, no matter how vapid and atrocious. For every bubblegum success that you might care to feel irked about, there are ten thousand bubblegum failures.
Hardly a consolation though is it?